THE NEED FOR A SOUND RELATIONSHIP(2)
Welcome to the concluding part of this teaching. In the last edition, we examined the need to build a sound relationship. This week, I will focus on some fundamental factors that must be in place to build a sound and meaningful relationship.
Fundamental Factors in Building a Sound Relationship.
- Define the Purpose. If a sound relationship must be built, this factor must be in place. The Word says: To everything under the sun, including relationships, there is a purpose (Ecclesiastes 3:1). Whatever relationship you are in, whether with your mates, superiors, or juniors, it is crucial and fundamental to define its purpose from the outset. Late Dr Myles Munroe said, “When the purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable.” Purpose is powerful, and relationships thrive on it. With purpose, focus is also enhanced. Defining and knowing the purpose of your relationship helps fight and overcome distractions. With a well-defined purpose, you can know whether you are on track or not, and it makes correct evaluation possible.
- Be Sincere to Yourself. It is important to know that you are the principal actor in any relationship you are involved in. So, refuse to play the game of self-deceit and be true to yourself. For any relationship to be outstanding, a good understanding is required. Be practical and real; find out your weaknesses and strength, attitude and temperament. To build sound and meaningful relationships, learn to seek and receive help in your area of weakness. The Word says: Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall (1 Corinthians 10:12).Successful relationship begins with you, so do not pretend to be super-strong when you know you are not. A sound relationship is possible when the principal actor, which is you, is sincere.
- Examine Your Motives. Motives are powerful, and they are everything. No wonder the Word says: Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith: prove your own selves: know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates (2 Corinthians 13:5)?Motive is defined as the reason for doing something. So, examine your motives! You are the best examiner of your life; whether you have an ulterior or pure and godly motive, it is clearly known and never hidden from you. Interestingly, God sees beyond your actions; you may succeed in deceiving man, but you cannot deceive God. So, from the beginning of that relationship, sanitise your motive before you go into it, as this will make it sound, healthy and rewarding.
- Be a Contributor. It is very important to go into a relationship as a contributor, not as a burden. What you go into a relationship with will determine what you get out of it. The Word says: Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend (Proverbs 27:17).Seek to sharpen and add value to the live(s) of the other party(parties) involved in any relationship you go into. Don’t keep looking for what to get; instead, think of what to add and give. Constantly bear in mind the fact that what you make happen for others determines what God makes happen for you. Giving is living, so contribute and invest spiritually, materially and otherwise to the development and growth of the relationships you are involved in. When contribution is one-sided, it cripples relationships. So beware of selfishness and stop taking undue advantage of people.
- Engage in Constant Evaluation. Constantly evaluate your relationships, and in doing so, ask yourself: “Is this relationship profitable to me and the other person or persons involved?” “Is it contributing anything to me and the parties involved?” Is it leaving me refreshed, energised, or is it draining me?” In a sound relationship, there will always be mutual respect for each other.
Another important area that requires constant evaluation is trust. No relationship can be healthy without trust. So evaluate whether there is trust. Also, examine your spiritual walk with God because any relationship with man that draws you backward in your walk with God is not godly; it does not deserve your consideration or attention.
However, to effectively build a sound relationship, you must be born again. If you are not born again, please say this prayer of faith: Dear Lord, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins. Cleanse me with Your precious Blood. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Now, I know I am born again!
Congratulations! You are now born again and a child of God. He loves you and will never leave or forsake you. With this, you are guaranteed all-round rest and peace, in Jesus’ name! Please write or call to share your testimonies with me through firstname.lastname@example.org OR 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian Bookstores: Single Not Entangled, Single With A Difference and Dating A Biblical Guide.