Dear Reader,

It is important to know that God’s intent is that we build a sweet and cordial relationship with one another, especially within the confines of marriage. No man is an island; relationships are vital to one’s destiny. However, to build and sustain relationships that will positively influence your life, especially in marital relationships, you must engage the key of wisdom.

Gaining wisdom is vital to our success in any given venture. God has made provisions for your marital relationship to produce good for you, but you have the responsibility to nurture it through wisdom. Couples must search the Word to access revelations for outstanding success in their family life. From the pattern of God’s Word, you can draw up a blueprint for your home. 

What is Wisdom?

Wisdom is hearing the sayings of our Lord Jesus Christ and doing them. It is the correct application of knowledge. It demands that you take the right steps in line with all you will learn from God this month concerning your home. Only then can you reap the fruits of a sweet and successful home. The Bible says, Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock (Matthew 7:24). The place of wisdom in building a successful home cannot be overemphasised. The Word of God says, Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding (Proverbs 4:7).

Wisdom is the principal thing on which all other things rest. A home is meant to be built for it to be successful. The Bible says, Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established (Proverbs 24:3). Therefore, to build a successful home, wisdom is required. A wise man said, ‘Courtship brings out the best, marriage brings out the rest’. That is why you need the God-given wisdom to know your spouse, adapt to him or her, and bring out the best that God has designed for your home.

Build a Godly Expectation:

God has promised to grant your expectations; so, you must ensure the expectations you have for your family and relationship is in accordance with God’s Word. Houses are in different sizes and shapes, and you cannot build what you do not desire. Do not enter into marriage not desiring a good relationship with your spouse. You only get peace when you genuinely desire the same. Debunk whatever negative experiences you may have had or heard people say and expect the best as ordained by God.

Accept your Responsibilities:

You are the builder of your home; so, stop wishing! Work on making your home a success, and you will reap the fruits of your labour! Expectation is the mother of manifestation. What do you expect your home to be? Success or failure, stressful or stress-free, full of troubles or peace? Then, get down to work.

If you expect success in your home, then apply the wisdom of God; be a doer of the Word and do whatever He tells you to do. When you do your part, God is committed to making your home a success; He can never fail. The Bible instructs husbands to dwell with their wives according to knowledge (1 Peter 3:7). Understand her nature; when a man understands the nature of his wife and work according to that understanding, problems are less likely to arise in that home. Realise that she is a wife, mother and homemaker all at once, and these places demands on her. Be considerate towards her and be available to minister to her needs. Do not wait for her to play her part first; live by example. Wives are not to be treated as slaves or inferior human beings; rather, they should be held in respect. This is the wisdom of God! Men who beat their wives exhibit folly and sin against God.

God has placed the building of the house into your hands. The Bible says, Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands (Proverbs 14:1). Do not operate in foolishness, do not pluck down your home; operate in the wisdom of God. Abide with God’s instructions; they are not grievous. Even if you are married to a man whose level of understanding is lower than yours, remember Abigail. Through her wisdom and understanding, she saved her home even though she had a foolish husband (1 Samuel 25:14-35).

Identify your husband’s weaknesses and help him work on them. Learn to appreciate his good points, point out his mistakes in a kind and loving manner. This is God’s wisdom. Embrace it! If you abide by God’s instruction, it will make your home precious before God and men. As husband and wife, you are the builders of your home. Marriage can be likened to a physical house. Houses in the physical do not just happen; they are consciously built. You do not just wake up one day and see a physical house grow up somewhere. It takes conscious effort and input to make it happen. In the same manner, and even much more, a good marriage does not just happen; it is consciously made to happen. The Word of God says, Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established (Proverbs 24:3). You have the duty to build it the way you want it to be. Stop shifting your responsibilities to God!  As my husband would always say, ‘Any faith that makes God absolutely responsible for the happenings of your life is an irresponsible faith’. The act of building is your responsibility. Therefore, you must fulfil your own part for God to fulfil His own.

For you to possess good qualities that will make your relationship last, you need a good relationship with Christ. Therefore, if you are not born again, and you want to accept Jesus as your Lord and personal Saviour, then say this prayer in faith: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. I accept You as my Lord and personal Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for delivering me from sin and satan to serve the living God and thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

Congratulations! If you prayed this simple prayer of faith with me, you are now born again and a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21). With this, you are guaranteed all round rest and peace, in Jesus name! Call or write to share your testimonies with me through oyedepofaitha@gmail.com, 07026385437 OR 08141320204.

For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).