Peace and blessings, in Jesus name! It is with great joy I write you today the Word of God; to bless, nourish and establish you in all your endeavours and in your family life. It will interest you to stick to this page always to ascertain the blessedness and the exceeding riches of God’s Word, which is the lamp to your feet and the light that directs your everyday life. Today, I will expound the subject I titled: ‘Becoming an Instrument of Peace’.
What is Peace?
Peace is the ability to resolve conflicts and differences without violence, and this is able to improve the quality of one’s life. Peace is a concept of harmony and the absence of hostility and violence. Furthermore, one can literally say that peace is lack of conflict and presence of harmony and understanding.
Where there is peace, the evidence shows in tranquility, kindness, gentleness, tolerance, forgiveness and love. Therefore, to maintain a peaceful home as a mother, you have to be considerate, accommodating and lovable. The growth and development of everyone in a family is dependent on the level of peace the family enjoys. Wherever there is peace, there is progress and accelerated advancement.
It is no longer news with the current happenings around the world that peace is becoming a costly commodity in most families; either from the parents, children and even the extended families. So far, there has been chaos and misunderstandings among families today over mundane issues that should not be heard amidst the children of God. The good news is that God will restore peace to as many who desire to live a peaceful life in their homes, in Jesus name!
The absence of peace is chaos and conflict; hence, where there is no peace, there will always be conflict. Conflict primarily occurs when there is a clash of interest; two or more parties having opposing agenda, desires or goals. It manifests in tension, lack of tranquility and co-ordination.
The following are the causes of conflict in homes:
Lack of Communication: Communication is an effective key for any family that is stable and peaceful. When there is lack of communication in the home, it creates tension in most families and further deters the possibilities of a peaceful co-existence and harmony. Improper communication can include yelling, holding grudges, keeping secrets, blaming, threats and many more. More often than not, little or no time is given for explanations before jumping into conclusions and assumptions. This results to misunderstandings and further conflicts in homes.
Insecurities: Insecurity simply means anxiety or uncertainty about oneself. It is also the perception of danger, threat from people or their actions. It can also mean not being confident about one’s abilities or relationship with people. Most families have been under the siege and turmoil of insecurities, this has threatened trust and dependence on each other. There is no trust in an insecure home; everybody suspects each other and this has stolen peace in such homes.
Finances: Primarily, when there is no transparency about finances, conflicts are bound to arise. As a couple, there should be financial transparency about all incomes and expenditures, this boosts trust and openness to one another. Most women tend to hide their monies from their husbands; that is a wrong way of living. Let your husband know about your income and it will not stop him from being responsible for the bills in the house. Do not sit and watch your husband suffer when you have money kept in your account. When you accepted to marry him, you pledged to share everything with him including your finances.
Furthermore, it is quite hard to live happily when there are tolls of bills to be paid and there is no means to pay them; children are out of school, no decent meals and many other things that can be done with money. However, the failure to manage finances effectively through budgeting causes conflict and also disrupts peace in homes.
Infidelity: Infidelity in marriage is one of the most prominent reasons for divorce in most marriages today. This happens when a wife or a husband engages in an extra-marital affair and overtime, it has been the root cause of troubles in homes.
External Interference: Inviting third party into marriage has destroyed many marriages. Constant external interference from family members, friends, relations and other persons who bring in different ideologies, mindsets and advice have overtime disrupted the peace of families. It is important to note that, marriage is just between two persons there is no need for a third party or external interference
Sibling Rivalry: This implies undue contention between siblings, either in a nuclear or polygamous home. This can be caused by competition and favouritism among parents. As a parent, it is extremely important you treat your children equally; no child is better than the other, every child has his/her uniqueness. However, seeds of strife and competition have been sown in most children, which has overtime affected the peace of many families and brought lots of enmity among siblings in homes. For anyone reading this today and currently experiencing rivalry between siblings, I declare peace, in the name of Jesus!
In-laws Rivalry: The coming together of different families to become one family has been one hard task for most people to achieve; due to differences in cultures, beliefs, educational backgrounds and ideologies. This has been one of the prominent relational issues in most families, where the in-laws are unable to accept or agree with the marriage relationship of their children, thereby breeding strife and hatred either between the families or for either couple.
Divorce: Divorce is often the climax of other causes of conflict in homes. When other conflicts are not rightly handled and discreetly managed, it gradually results in conflicts. In recent times, the rate of divorce is becoming increasingly common; reasons being that most couples have found it difficult to harness the beauty in their diversity of character, culture, values and outlook.
For as many who desire to have a peaceful home or their homes are on the verge of breaking away, may the peace of God envelope your family, in Jesus name! Remember, it is only God that can guarantee you everlasting peace in your homes; therefore, you need Jesus to enable you foster peace in your homes by accepting Him as your Lord and personal Saviour. If you yearn for that kind of peace Jesus guarantees, you can boldly say this prayer of faith with me: Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You today. I believe You died and rose again for my sake. Forgive me my sins, take over my life, make me Your child and let Your peace reign over my life. Thank You for saving me. Now I know I am born again!
Congratulations, you are now born again! I believe you will begin to experience the reality of the price that Jesus paid for your sins at Calvary. All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus name! Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through email@example.com OR call 07026385437 and 08141320204.
For more insight, these books are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian Bookstores: Making Marriage Work, Marriage Covenant, Success in Marriage co-Authored with my Husband