At creation, God made human being objects of choice. Conversely, choice never leaves us neutral; it either adds to us positively or negatively. That is why it must be made with discretion. The choice of a partner in marriage, especially, is so very vital because it is the foundation upon which a lifelong encounter of joy or sorrow is built.
God’s Word from 2 Corinthians 6:14-15 categorically gave us the platform for the choice of a successful marriage. It says: Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
Three words stand out clearly here: fellowship, communion, and concord. Fellowship means equals, sharing similar interests, ideas and/or experiences. Concord means harmony or agreement of interests and/or feelings. Communion means the act or an instance of sharing thoughts or feelings.
These three words communicate a unique and clear message of “togetherness.” They actually summarize what marriage is all about. Take these three components out of marriage, and it is doomed, because marriage is all about togetherness. If family success is your goal, then these three must inform your choice.
Two people going into marriage, must of necessity do so with someone in the same spiritual kingdom because, two people cannot walk together except there be some form of agreement between them (Amos 3:3).
This is primarily because, there is a fundamental difference between the character and life of a saved and unsaved persons. I can hear you ask, “How do I know the difference between them?” You can know the difference by their fruits (Matthew 7:20)! There is no meeting point between a Christian and a sinner (Genesis 24:3).
Taking a cue from the Abrahamic covenant, it does not permit an Israelite marrying a stranger; it must be from among their brethren (Genesis 24:4). We as children of Abraham, must do likewise.
No matter where the pressure is coming from: social, financial, or even parental pressures in your choice of a marriage partner, you must make up your mind that nothing will drive you into a relationship with an unbeliever.
Don’t be deceived to think that you can go ahead to marry an unbeliever with the intention of converting him or her after marriage. You are not the Holy Spirit! In fact, it is disobedience to God’s Word, which is equal to building on a faulty foundation. Such a building will collapse like a pack of cards in no time. Beware!
In case you are reading this and presently in a relationship with an unbeliever, don’t ever attempt to continue the relationship; you’re courting trouble!
Remember, successful marriages are products of successful individuals. So, until you are first a successful individual, you cannot succeed at being a successfully married person. Marriage is about responsibility. If Adam could not manage the responsibility of naming the animals, there was no guarantee that he could handle the added responsibility of a family (Genesis 2:19). In other words, are you a successful single Christian?
However, you cannot succeed in marriage until you have succeeded as a single Christian. How true! For instance, if as a single, you find it difficult to pray, study the Word of God, attend fellowship or be of service in the Kingdom; if your heart is not panting after God, the chances that you will develop these habits after marriage are slim.
This is especially true considering the fact that as a single, your time is more or less at your own disposal; you do not have the added responsibility of caring for a family, so you can be more effective in the Kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 7:32-33).
The Bible says: But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you (Matthew 6:33). This was the platform upon which my husband stood to get a wife (me, of course!) When he discovered this scripture, he simply invested his life into the work of God, and God added a sweet home to him. Your own testimony will be sweeter!
However, the journey and grace to be the right person begins with new life in Christ Jesus. If you would want to accept Him as your Lord and personal Saviour, then pray along with me by saying: “Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You today acknowledging that I am a sinner who needs Your forgiveness. I believe You died for me and rose again on the third day. Forgive me my sins, wash me with Your Blood and write my name in the Lamb’s Book of life. Thank You Lord for saving me.”
Congratulations! That’s it! Till I come your way next time, please call or write, and share your testimonies with me through: E-mail: email@example.com; Tel. No: 07026385437, 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian Bookstores: Singles With A Difference, A Living Witness and Marriage Covenant.