SINGLE BUT NOT LONELY (2)

SINGLE BUT NOT LONELY (2)

Dear Reader,

I am glad to bring God’s Word to you today; I hope you were blessed by the last teaching? So far we have learnt what singleness and loneliness are, the causes of loneliness and a remedy for loneliness. This week, I will go further by examining other causes of loneliness and the cure. I pray that your eyes of understanding will be opened to grasp all that God has for you today.

Changing Circumstances

This is another major cause of loneliness. Changing circumstances have become the order of the day in this changing world. Change of job, school, break up of long relationships, career change, etc. when such changes occur, it is important for you to handle them properly else, it may lead to loneliness. Now she that is a widow in deed, and desolate, trusteth in God, and continueth in supplications and prayers night and day (1 Timothy 5:5).

Societal Factors

Many have lost touch of healthy relationships as a result of the rapid, mobile and changing society; excessive television viewing and internet surfing has also taken the place of personal communication. Other things that lead to loneliness could be  when a person desires a relationship that is not happening, low self-esteem, feeling unneeded, shyness and busyness. These are all possible causes of loneliness if left unchecked.

Unfulfilled Expectations

Many youth and singles have relapsed into loneliness as a result of unfulfilled expectations. I want you to understand that failures of disappointment are not the end of the road for you. Truth is until you know how to successfully handle failure and disappointments, you never know the joy of success. As someone rightly said,  No man is defeated without until he has first been defeated within. The Bible says, Rejoice not against me, O mine enemy: when I fall, I shall arise; when I sit in darkness, the LORD shall be a light unto me (Micah 7:8).

Do not be overcome by loneliness as there are many dangers associated with it. This includes: Anxiety, depression, self-pity and helplessness. Many have tried to mask pain by oversleeping or putting in long hours at the office. Finally, the stress imposed by loneliness leads to a weakened immune system, heart disease, and other physical ailments. The moral is clear. It is time to decide to do something about it quickly.

Cures

  • Replace depressing feelings with Gods everlasting truth such as 2 Timothy 4:16-17, At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge. Notwithstanding the Lord stood with me, and strengthened me.
  • Spend quality time in His presence. It can become a productive experience with positive results. (1 Kings 19:9, Daniel 10:8).
  • Pray for God to provide the right person who will encourage you and whom you can also help. (Psalm 32:8, Proverb 27:17, Ecclesiastes 4:10, 2 Corinthians 7:6).
  • Go for professional Christian counseling. The Bible says, Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety (Proverbs 11:14).
  • Reach out to others, do some volunteer work. Do those good works that involve helping others e.g. join activity group in the church. Be aggressive towards your goals, and take new risks in specific areas.
  • You could prayerfully consider a change of job.
  • Travel, move (leave your comfort zone), listen to Christian music, read good books and engage yourself in writing, take up new hobbies, expand your horizons. 
  • Self-inventory: Take an inventory of your behaviour. Are you a show-off? Domineering? Moody? A complainer? A gossip? Unreliable? Nosy? Short-tempered? A taker that doesn’t know how to give? Do you build walls instead of bridges? Would you want to be friends with someone like you? Questions provoke thought and point to solutions. How can you take corrective action unless you ask yourself what you are doing wrong?
  • Focus on giving, not receiving: Don’t give others what you don’t want to receive. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. (Matthew 7:12).
  • Accept responsibility: Stop blaming and start taking responsibility for the choices you make. It is time to make the right choices. You deserve to be happy. So, take the steps that will pull you out of the gutter of loneliness. Blame is self-defeating. Responsibility is self-actualising. Live by the precept, ‘If it is to be, it is up to me’.
  • Focus on the positive: If you don’t have any friends, look in the mirror, and what do you see? A smile or a frown? If we walk around with a chip on our shoulder, we drive people away. Conversely, if we are polite and friendly, we attract others to us.
  • Exercise: Be active, get involved in an exercise program. Exercise will make you feel better by improving your health, lifting your spirits, and boosting your confidence. And while doing so, you may make new friends.

Ultimately, the first step to overcoming loneliness is to accept Jesus Christ into your life if you have not done so. If you will like to do this, please say this prayer: Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You today as a sinner. I believe You died for my sins and rose on the third day.  Forgive me of my sins. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God. Today, I receive your love that will terminate loneliness in my life. Thank you, Jesus, for loving and accepting me. Amen.

Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org, and counselling@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204. For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian Bookstores: Single With A Difference, Make Your Life Count and Welcome to God’s Family.

 

 

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Comments

  1. kadenge judith : July 30, 2019 at 6:53 am

    started liking the teaching, please pray for me cos am very sad. am the elder sister in my family. my mother died and kept every responsibility with my siblings which even i think led to my single life. have 2 children in different fathers who actually could leave me because of the many responsibilities i had as far as my brothers and sisters are concerned.now they r grown some married , they don’t even want to hear or even respect me. one even talked evil about my son who the lord is blessing.please pray for me am i tears.

  2. Edward Ikechukwu Uchebike. : July 30, 2019 at 6:32 am

    This short write up is powerful beloved Mummy. Thank you so much ma.

  3. Thank you mummy for this wonderful insight am really blessed and I thank God for using this message to terminate the siege of loneliness in my life am truely blessed Amen

  4. Hellen Morris : July 29, 2019 at 9:23 pm

    Thànks mum am single but thru your encouragement n God who has been on my side am strong n more better than ever God bless you mum you r a blessing

  5. Thank you mummy for this write-up,it was very encouraging.
    Love you ma.

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