Dear Reader,

I will be sharing with you via God’s Word on what I captioned, Single but not Lonely. I do hope that you will really be blessed in Jesus’ name! Before we go on to see what God has for us today, it is important that we look at the meaning of the subject matter.


According to the dictionary, a single person is an unmarried person. To be single means to consist of a separate unique whole: it means to be a distinct and successful individual, capable of initiative and having the capacity to contribute to and enrich another person’s life.


To be lonely means to be unhappy because one is alone or do not have anyone they can talk to. Loneliness is a complex and usually unpleasant emotional response to isolation.

It is critical for me to state here that singleness does not equate loneliness. Lonely people feel alienated from their surroundings. There is no one to share their personal concerns and experience with. Lonely people find it difficult to make friends beyond mere acquaintances.

Loneliness is one common challenge youths and singles face today, which is responsible for why many rush into relationships, most of which end up in regrets. In an attempt to cure this plague, some have been pressured into making decisions that have ruined their destinies. This shall not be your portion in Jesus name.  The BibIe says in Psalm 142:4-5,  I looked on my right hand, and beheld, but there was no man that would know me: refuge failed me; no man cared for my soul. I cried unto thee, O LORD: I said, Thou art my refuge and my portion in the land of the living.

God designed us with an intrinsic need to be loved and to belong. As children, we learn to give and receive affection and are taught skills that will help us find acceptance in the society. Through our relationship with family, friends, co-workers and others, we form our sense of individuality and find our place in the mosaic of life.  On the other hand, loneliness is a feeling or a state of isolation or separation from others. It is a feeling and awareness that intimacy and understanding, friendship and acceptance are missing from one’s life. If unchecked in time, it may lead to depression, a result of one’s inability to cope with the facts of life. Let us examine some of the causes of loneliness:

Poor Family Relationships

 God designed the family to be a place of fellowship and healthy relationship. However, we find out that when relationships among family members are lacking, family members start seeking such from the outside world. But because that kind of relationship can only be obtained in the context of a family unit, it is usually very difficult to find it with friends. This is why even when such individuals are in the midst of many people, they still feel lonely and empty.  I have come to discover that the single years are the years one ought to prepare for that successful family relationship that you desire.


 This is an unfriendly or aggressive behaviour towards people or ideas resulting from a feeling of anger and bitterness that alienate others and drive them away.  Loneliness can also be induced by a feeling of bitterness most especially. Bitterness resulting in distrust for everyone that comes around. This could also lead to a transfer of aggression on to other people and so the person becomes a difficult person to be with. The aloneness that results could also be a cause of loneliness.

Spiritual causes

This has to do with estrangement from God due to unconfessed sin. This can also be a cause of loneliness. So also can a feeling of rejection by friends, colleagues, even in ministry. Several people in the Bible had this kind of experiences, I sat not in the assembly of the mockers, nor rejoiced; I sat alone because of thy hand: for thou hast filled me with indignation. (Jeremiah 15:17) And he said, I have been very jealous for the LORD God of hosts: for the children of Israel have forsaken thy covenant, thrown down thine altars, and slain thy prophets with the sword; and I, even I only, am left; and they seek my life, to take it away (1 Kings 19:10). This could be the cause of that loneliness you are experiencing, therefore you need to return to your maker; your first love.

Having considered some of the causes of loneliness, let us look at one of the ways in which you can overcome loneliness:

Be Willing to Receive God’s Love

It does not matter your situation or what you may be going through; never forget that it is God who created you. You are a product of His ultimate and unending love for mankind, therefore He will never leave you nor forsake you. The Bible says in Matthew 11:28, Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you (1 Peter 5:7).

Therefore, you must cultivate an intimate relationship with God. He loves you and is beckoning on you to take away that loneliness and give you lasting peace. Would you rather not accept His love?

You can accept Him now if you have not done so. If you will like to do this, please say this prayer: Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You today as a sinner. I believe You died for my sins and rose on the third day.  Forgive me of my sins. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God’ Today, I receive your love that will terminate loneliness in my life. Thank you, Jesus, for loving and accepting me. Amen.

Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write and share your testimonies with me through, and; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204. For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian Bookstores: Single With A Difference, Make Your Life Count and Welcome to God’s Family.




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