I’m just as excited over this portion of the article as I was over the last one.
Last time, we talked about how being compared to your family only meant that your roots are strong and enviable. This time, in answering the question of how important loving yourself is, our focus is on the fact that you can only go as far as you love yourself.
You can only believe in your dreams and trust yourself to the extent at which you love yourself. This is because your self- love translates into your definition of self-worth, self-belief, self-trust and self-action. You will never take a step into a position you feel incapable of commanding. You will be scared. Your fears would defeat you long before defeat becomes a possibility.
I once sat with a friend of mine who wanted to be a model. She is extremely beautiful and also had that quirky quality most agencies looked out for. She seemed more than able for the job, but she didn’t believe half as much in herself as she should have. She would always beat herself down. She thought that if she called herself the worst names in the book, when others called her those names, she wouldn’t feel the hurt. But she was wrong! When in fact others did call her those names, they only brought her down even lower and beneath her knees. So, she struggled.
Just as much as many of her friends thought she was more beautiful than they were, she thought she was less beautiful than a whole lot more of us. She crucified herself and sent her love beyond the four walls of her existence. She compared and compared. She could compare herself to her friends, classmates, parents, their friends and even her enemies. She created her own hit list and her name was the only one on it. That was her fall.
Yes, she went to the agencies and yes, she got rejected by all of them. It was a small town and we knew it all seemed off, but we weren’t surprised. We weren’t at all surprised that she lost her place to her fears, because her self-love had slowly begun to turn to self-hate. It wasn’t there yet but it was close. That was what took her away from destiny, for the time being.
I know many of you reading this might feel that you’ve begun losing your place. You’ve discouraged and demeaned yourself to the point that you can’t stand your own presence. You’ve taken the power that Christ placed in you and almost smashed it on the ground. You’ve lost your own footing and know that you’re slipping but can’t help yourself.
Some of you even have left the level of dislike and now practice self-hate. You believe in hating yourself more than you believe in Christ and you worship your weaknesses in front of your maker. Now I’ll tell you a little truth.
That girl I spoke of earlier, doesn’t exist. She exists prominently in the minds of some of us and unfortunately, in some of us PKs (Preachers’ Kids). I was going to tell a story about a girl I really did know, but my spirit felt the need to express a different story. One that unfortunately resonates more with the happenings in many of our lives and it’s sad. We are much more than that and deserve to treat ourselves much better; more than we can demand of anyone else.
I have weaknesses too. I have lots of them. They show up daily, but I don’t know the half of them. Yes, they cross my mind every now and then, but I ensure that I don’t give them enough room. I don’t sit to consider their outfits or in what way they should affect my life and destiny. I gave them all to God when I gave Him all of me.
Yes, I gave Him the exceptionally good parts of me, but much more, I gave Him the weak parts of me. Only He could help raise me up the times I needed help the most, and only Him could help turn them into strengths. That’s why I don’t bash myself. I let Him do His work, and stop trying to break myself down. I can’t give Him the room to work if I decide to keep breaking myself down.
Please don’t bash yourself. Not ever!
It is only when you love yourself to let Him work that you can enjoy the benefits of His repairs. You are the most beautiful you there EVER will be and God wants to use you. He wants to make you greater than your last name. He wants to make you a showpiece to the world. Please, let Him.
Don’t hide your scars, use them as a guiding light to lead you straight to His master plan for you; and along the way, light the path for someone else. The place of your greatest hurt is the very place He wants to use you the most. Allow, trust and believe Him. No one can beat you at being you! That’s why you are His first great gift to you. You are special to Him and that is the number one reason He sent me to you. Live the breadth and not just the length of your life. Make the most of every circumstance. Enjoy the life He has programmed for you and you alone. You are more than worth the price.
Until next time, please call or write, and share your testimonies with me through firstname.lastname@example.org and Contact@faithoyedepo.org, Tel: 07026385437 or 08141320204
For more insight, these books authored by Pastor Faith Oyedepo are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian Bookstores: Singles With A Difference, A Living Witness and Make Your Life Count.
Lots of love from your friend,