You are most welcome to another inspirational edition on this column. This column is meant to introduce sanity, joy, excitement and sweetness to your family life. I can see the Lord doing great and mighty things in your family. As you apply yourself to these eternal truths for successful family living, your home shall become a garden of treasures in Jesus’ Name. Amen.
This glorious month, I will be taking you through the Consequences of a Bad Marriage. This week, I want to teach on Faulty Foundation.
‘Faulty foundation’ here refers to those who got married without proper marriage procedures. Many people today live with their partners without paying dowry, having a formal engagement or a public Christian wedding. Rather than feel or live in condemnation, why not make things right? This is the major reason for this very teaching. Take a practical step right away, go and pay the dowry. If you are not legally married and you are in this category, go and “legalize” your union.
I want you to know that time never corrects an error. An error of yesterday remains an error today, except it is corrected. Some couples have been living together for years and even have children without proper marriage. Marriage is the foundation for the family. If you must enjoy a successful marriage, then you must first be married. The payment of any form of dowry is scriptural. That you are a Christian does not override the payment of that which is due to the parents. The Word of God says: And Jesus answering said to them, Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar’s, and to God the things that are God’s. And they marveled at him (Mark 12:17). The payment of dowry is the right of the bride’s family, so ensure you give it to them; pay the dowry, if it has not been paid. After you pay the dowry, let your pastor bless your union.
The Bible records a graphic picture of a typical wedding, and all that is required to be done. Abraham sent his servant to get a wife for his son, Isaac, from among his brethren. The Word of God says: Behold, Rebekah is before you, take her, and go, and let her be your master’s son’s wife, as the Lord has spoken. And it came to pass, that, when Abraham’s servant heard their words, he worshipped the Lord, bowing himself to the earth. And the servant brought forth jewels of silver, and jewels of gold, and raiment, and gave them to Rebekah: he gave also to her brother and to her mother precious things (Genesis 24:51-53).
However, I must mention that in the payment of dowry, you should watch the kind of things you present as dowry. Anything that you know will affect your Christian testimony should never be given.
Marriage is a covenant relationship between a man and a woman on the horizontal level, then between God and both of them on a vertical level. This is the reason why it is important to have a public Christian wedding ceremony in a Bible-believing church. When you have your wedding in church, you have formally invited God to be the third party in your union. That is why you must not just pick up a woman, go under a tree, ask your friend to officiate as well as bless the marriage and both of you just start living together without anything formal. This is one of the reasons many marriages break-up after a few years, because proper Christian wedding ceremony is lacking.
A public Christian wedding makes it impossible for people to claim not to know that you are married. Although, in this “fast” age, some young ladies and even men don’t mind having a relationship with married men/women, a public wedding helps keep them off!
It is also important to have a proper documentation of your union. In God’s dealing with man, He always ensures there is a token, which acts as a constant reminder of the terms of the covenant. With Noah in Genesis 8:20-22 and 9:14-17 it was the rainbow. Abraham had to undergo circumcision in Genesis 17:9-11. Even Jesus had the seal of His blood as proof of the covenant of our salvation (Hebrews 8:6).
A legal backup for your marriage is not a safety device, as the world would consider it. It is simply a point of contact to remind God that you have fulfilled all righteousness concerning your marriage; therefore, the enemy must not have access into your family.
I want to advise those who are not yet married. If you are in courtship, there must be no room for sexual relationship or anything that leads to it. Someone may say, “But we intend to marry”. As long as you are not yet married, it is sinful for you to engage in it or do anything that leads to it. This is the beginning of a bad marriage. If you have been doing it, stop it or it will stop you from enjoying God’s blessings in your marriage.
Do you want to have peace in your marriage and home? Surrender your life to Christ today by saying this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You today as a sinner. Forgive me of my sins. I believe You died and rose on the third day for my sins. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”
Congratulations, you are now born again! I believe that you will begin to experience the reality of the price that Jesus paid for your sins at Calvary. All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you in Jesus’ Name! Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through firstname.lastname@example.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).