Thank God for another privilege to write again on this platform. I am glad to inform you that God cares about you. He wants you and your family to succeed.
God’s will is that you succeed in your marital life, but there are vices you need to guard against. The topic for this month is: The Right Character. I will be pointing out some of these vices and how to combat them in order to reap the joy and blessings of marriage.
Many times, as two grown individuals mature in age and mind prepare for marriage and to start a family, there are deceptive thoughts that cross their minds. They tend to feel that marriage is the solution to all their problems.
A young girl with nagging parents and accommodation challenge may feel it is an escape route from her troublesome circumstances, while a lady with financial challenge feels marrying a rich man settles her financially. A man on the other hand, feels marriage will solve his challenge of getting a cook or someone to clean the house or it will earn him that promotion he has been long awaited in his office. Besides, some believe that marriage helps them solve their challenge of irresponsibility.
Despite these ideas, marriage does not automatically lift a man above the works of the flesh, “the vices of the flesh”. Yielding to the flesh or wrong attitudes account for the heartache many families experience in their homes today. The Scripture says: Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like… (Galatians 5:19-21).
These character traits in the above scripture steal the peace and joy in a marriage and hinder family success.
When you hear your would-be-spouse say, “Don’t worry, I’ll change when we get marriage” or “Things will get better when we are married”, be cautious because in most cases it is not true. A well known man of God used to say, “A lizard in Nigeria will not become an alligator in America”. Whatever character one possesses before marriage is what it will be after marriage. It is only by the transforming power of the Word of God that is able to cause positive changes in an individual, and this is only the resolute decision and input of the individual himself.
Action speaks louder than words, is an adage made popular by the world (2 Thessalonians 3:7). As a child of God, you should let your actions give glory to God and be an example for your family to follow. Example, they say, is the best teacher.
Are you the kind of man who says “I love you” to your wife now and the next minute you are found beating or raining curses on her? If so, your behaviour is in conflict with what you have said. Or are you the kind of wife who keeps shouting abusive words at your husband? He’s watching all that you do and matches it with what you profess.
Imagine someone who just finished fighting in his apartment and a few minute after he carries his Bible to witness to someone else in that same apartment about the Lord Jesus Christ. He will never make headway; he will be ridiculed.
Some people have a lot of charisma, but little character. However, someone once said “Charisma without character equals crisis”. In homes, there is need for us to “walk our talk, not just talk our walk.” Proverb 11:3 makes us realize that there’s a reward for those who walk in integrity, and integrity is what lends credence to your actions.
Integrity is what will help a wife to trust her husband in all his dealings. It is what makes the husband to trust his wife with his money. The Scripture says: The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil (Proverb 31:11). Believe me, you are the sole determinant of the actions you take. That decision must be made by you and you must abide by it. However, God is able to inject into you the power you need to live a victorious life in your home, at work, with friends, and with your family.
To be wiser than God is to be the biggest fool. There is always a price to be paid for every anti-scriptural character that you exhibit. It is character that makes a successful home. So, if you desire success in your life and family, build a character that is rooted in the Word. A minister of the gospel says: “The Word of God is character-building.” It is right character that gives birth to right marriage.
If you desire the Lord Jesus to come into your life with transforming power why not say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You today as a sinner. Forgive me of my sins. I believe You died and rose on the third day for my sins. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”
Congratulations, you are now born again! I believe that you will begin to experience the reality of the price that Jesus paid for your sins at Calvary. All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you in Jesus’ Name! Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through email@example.com; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Single with a Difference, A Living Witness and Make Your Life Count.